When ex-Speaker Joseph Gurney Cannon of Illinois retired from politics in 1923, he had served almost continuously in the House of Representatives for nearly fifty years, and was regarded as a master political strategist and a shrewd judge of men. But, as he sorrowfully confessed to his longtime secretary and biographer, L. White Busbey, his discernment did not extend to inventors and their get-rich-quick schemes.

I met a learned Justice of the Supreme Court who had looked into [an invention for converting base metal into gold] … He assured me that a man who had a thousand dollars to invest would become a millionaire in a few years. … I had been a man of frugal ways and had saved a thousand dollars. I had the money in bank and I took the advice of the jurist and the scientists and got in on the ground floor. The scientists and other less scientific dreamers, including myself, are no longer looking for millions but would be quite happy to get back our thousands.

A few years later I was on Newspaper Row, on Fourteenth Street, where the newspaper men had their offices, and I met Uriah Painter, one of the veteran Washington correspondents. He was also a good business man. Painter asked me if I had ever seen a telephone and I confessed that I had not. We went into his office and he walked over to a little box on the wall. He put a little instrument to his ear, rang a bell and spoke into the box. He said, “Hello, Puss, how are you? I want you to speak to Mr. Cannon, who is here in my office.” He handed me the receiver and putting it to my ear, as I had seen him do, I heard Mrs. Painter’s voice distinctly. It was amazing. Then he told her to play on the piano and I heard the music. It was magic. I was very much interested, and Mr. Painter told me about the young Scotchman Bell, how they were organizing a company and insisted the men who invested their money could not lose. He said if I had a thousand dollars to invest, I would be sure to double, perhaps quadruple my money in a few years; I might even make ten thousand by getting in on the ground floor. I had been much impressed by hearing a human voice that I recognized come out of that little piece of metal … but I was even more impressed by the proposition to get in on the ground floor. I remembered my experience with the wonderful discovery to make gold out of any old thing, and I said, “Nay, nay, Brother Painter, I’ve tried these get-rich-quick inventions and I am done.”

Not long afterwards I went down to the office of the Superintendent of Railway Mails to get a young man appointed to that service. The Superintendent, Theodore Vail, was a bright young fellow, accommodating and always ready to